When I heard that there was an opportunity to try some brand new Tim Tam flavours, I just about fell over myself in my rush to say, "ME! PLEASE, ME!!". I love the OG Tim Tam anyway, but the new flavours sounded incredible, and just too irresistible NOT to try. Australian celeb chef Adrian Zumbo collaborated last year with Tim Tam to create the Red Velvet & Salted Caramel flavours; and now they're back again this year with the addition of two new guys- Coconut Cream and Choc Raspberry. Not only have I painstakingly taste tested each kind (look, it wasn't a chore), & compiled tasting notes (because I'm SAH posh); I've thought of different scenarios where eating these would be appropriate. Obviously you can eat them ANY time, but these are my suggestions...you're welcome ;)
I was going to attempt to write an intro for tonight's ep, but honestly, I can't stop laughing, and my eyes are nearly bugging out of my skull. Neither of these are conducive to intelligent writing, so instead of that, how about I just get started recapping this idiotic show? Okay? COOL.
And we're back! My sincerest apologies for neglecting you all last week- but the break did me good, and now I'm rearing to go, ready to recap, mock, and cringe- so you don't have to. It looks like last week was hideous, but hilarious with Art being apparently "friend-zoned" by Danielle (that DRESS was AMAZING), and Krystie being given the shove. I just about died when she asked the girls why they weren't crying, so if you're reading this, Krystie- I'm crying. With embarrassment. Let's go.
I chat to the US Bachelor S16 winner, Courtney Robertson about the show, Art, & budget picnic dates.
Courtney Robertson is the winner of the US Bachelor Season 16- and in all honesty, would have been remembered whether she had won or not. Not only did Courtney make for fantastic TV viewing; but she wrote (an extremely explicit) tell-all, behind the scenes book called "I Didn't Come here To Make Friends; Confessions of A Reality Show Villain". It is AWESOME, & I highly recommend that you check it out here (she didn't ask me to plug this, she's actually far too sweet and polite to do such a thing, I just really love the book). Have a read, & go say hi and thank you to Courtney on Twitter or Instagram, she's honestly such a sweetheart...and she used to live in Auckland- whooop!
Becoming a beauty & fashion blogger has really encouraged me to up my game. I do the majority of my work from the couch (great, right?!), and while that is cool, there are certain things I need to do, and certain items I need to have to ensure I don't turn into a total slob kebab. I was lucky enough to get my hands on the COOLEST new phone, the Samsung S6, before it was released on April 11th...and it inspired me to write about all the other things I'm considering to be my essentials right now. I'm going to tell you about them in this post, and explain exactly why I need all this swag- I promise you that I'm not writing this post in my pyjamas (today).
1. When MUO grew, and followers on Twitter & Instagram started increasing, it because apparent that my poor old phone simply couldn't cope- sometimes it would even turn itself off if I got too many notifications. Like a toddler throwing a tantrum, if you will. Thank god I was given the new Samsung S6 to try out, and it is magnificent. Not only is it super stylish-looking (yes, this is important to me), but the pics and vids it takes are of such high quality I can't believe that I actually took them myself. I also do a lot of Kindle reading using the S6, and this is where the huge screen comes into play. Not having to strain my eyes equals less Botox for meee..oh, and it's better for my eyes of course. And it's fast- SO fast. I'm on an excellent plan with Spark that has a tonne of data- obviously something I need a LOT of. It also includes Spotify Premium (which would normally cost an extra $12.99 a month), so I can listen to music all day long- it's just brilliant. I'm not going to lie, I feel a lot cooler with this phone than I did with my other poor old potato phone. You can read more about it & order here- but be quick- it's shaping up to be super popular!
Happy Thursday, Bachelor recap readers! Last night's episode was fairly average at best, but I'm still here- and still committed to writing about this nightmare of a show. Now, before I start, I need to remind you guys of something. The Bachelor NZ is a highly edited "reality" show. Each contestant on this show plays a character of some kind, with varying degrees of success. When I comment on the contestants, their actions, and their weird ways- I may as well be commenting on characters from Shortland Street. I don't know any of them personally- therefore I have ZERO idea what they are like in real life. They could be great, or they could be complete arseholes, and I doubt I'll ever find out which is the case. My point is- whatever I say, however scathing it is, is not meant to be taken personally or as gospel. People have asked me if I'd read the things out loud to whoever I'm making fun of at the time, and my answer is a resounding, "Oh hell yes."- because it is a JOKE. Several of the contestants do read these recaps, and have zero issue with what I say- they know it's tongue in cheek, they know I'm being a ridiculous smart-arse, and they have a sense of humour. Jesus, they tell me to hurry up and publish the recaps each day so they can read them. They're not fussed- and neither should anyone else be. It's only a recap of a TV show- not news coverage of the situation in Syria. Let's crack on, okay?
I found myself thinking about Chrystal during the weekend, which was sad and aggravating. Most of me thinks that the producers needed a villain, and are pushing her/using editing to make her out to be the bitch from hell. It seems to be working, & I've no complaints- any reality show worth it's weight needs a character we love to hate. Then I read another blogger's Bach' recap, written by a woman who is strongly in favour of C Monster. She thinks that C Monster isn't a bitch at all, and that she is merely self confident, albeit SLIGHTLY more assertive than the average human. When I read that, I thought, "Oh crap, she's right, C Monster has really just been playing the game as it should be played- why am I calling an assertive, confident woman a witch?? NOT COOL, KIRSTY". I berated myself for a few days- until I saw last night's ep. I was right. C Monster is a dick. Editing or no editing- her behaviour goes above and beyond just being "assertive". Watching C Monster is like watching a lesson in how NOT to interact with and treat other women. So- shall we discuss the show?
Last night's episode was all that I possibly could have dreamed of- if the dream in question was a hellish nightmare that I couldn't wake up from. Like one of those dreams where all your teeth fall out. It was excruciating, and I'm overwhelmed at the thought of having to re-live it. I actually considered telling you guys that I just could NOT, but I'd feel guilty...and it's Easter. I want to eat my chocolate and sit around feeling gross free from guilt. So I'll suck it up, and do this recap.
Before I do, though, let's discuss the odd Twitter exchange between Art & I yesterday. Dani is hilarious too chat to on the Twit', and her & I have had several cute exchanges. I like her. Yesterday I told her that I didn't like the way Art spoke to her (always condescending) and that he needed a stern word. at this point, she tagged Art in, and told me to go for it- so of course I did. I asked him why he is so patronising all the time. No reply. I laughed to Dani that he was ignoring me because I am too old for him (fact). He then replied telling me that he didn't know how to "work Twitter yet" and to stop "blowing up" his phone.
1. Two Twitter mentions does not equate to "blowing up" someone's phone. If he wants me to blow up his phone with tweets, ohhh, I will. With pleasure.
2. If your phone notifications are aggravating you, you should figure out how to "work" your phone settings, & turn them off.
3. I know not everyone likes Twitter or "gets" Twitter. But surely a successful paleo food business would benefit from the great marketing Twitter has to offer.
4. Like he doesn't love the attention.
5. He didn't answer my question.
Enough. On with the show.
This hour of hell rolled around far, far too quickly for my liking. At least I was prepared this time by remembering that it was actually ON, so I had the necessary props of wine, a breathing apparatus, and more wine. In the interest of full disclosure, I must tell you that at around the half way point I was so bored that I wandered off, found a pack of cards, and engaged in a frantic/highly exciting game of Last Card with my boyfriend while it played in the background. Last Card isn't the remotest bit frantic/highly exciting, but in comparison to The Bach' it is and this is what I am reduced to. On with the stupid, stupid show.
This is the part of the blog where I write about anything I like, so...